My story is about how a simple shy traditional girl went through emotional roller coaster and survived depression after struggling with it for 5 years.
I grew up as a black sheep of the family. Studying, reading a book was extremely difficult for me. I used to feel let down when my brother was always chosen upon me and severely lacked appreciation and approval. Then swimming came to my rescue. I became the swimming champ and represented my state in nationals. Then I got my share of appreciation and felt proud of myself. However, in India you need to be good in studies, rest does not matter. Though I was good in drawing also, my brother got all the needed attention. My self-esteem was low since childhood and I gave excessive importance to people, friends and relatives.
Somehow with great difficulty I completed my studies and got job in an MNC. I was very happy. Finally, I had something to showcase. In 3 years I got married. It was a love marriage and I had to fight to convince my family. But I was very happy and thought I got the best partner who loves me a lot. However, things didn't turn out as expeceted. Horrific part of my life had just started. Though I never stayed with my in-laws, my husband left no stone unturned in behaving like them. We had constant fights and he constantly pointed my short comings. Gradually, situation became worse, fights happened everyday and slowly there was no communication between both of us. Physical, Verbal abuse was too much for me to handle. One good thing was after 2 years I was able to stand for myself and fight back. I believe there is a point in everybody's life when we say enough is enough. I decided divorce is my solution. It was very difficult to convince my parents and I had to listen to all sort of things from people about my decision of getting married to him. Then after 4 long years of convincing and fighting with both the families and my husband, I got my freedom. My family supported me a lot after they understood my condition. During this period, depression caught hold of me.
Now, my struggle against depression started. I used to swing between extreme anger and extreme sadness. I had many unpleasant experiences with friends, relatives and roommates. However, I was lucky, my parents took me to right doctors. With 5 years of constant counselling and medication, today I am able to live a stable life.
Friends, if a shy girl who had practically no self esteem can survive then u too. Never stop believing in yourself. If you feel something is not right then it is not right. Trust yourself. Today I am very active across various events happening in Bangalore. I try to help people who are struggling like me and try to give back to society as much as I can. I am doing well at work and have mellowed down a lot. My emotions are very much under control.
"Giving is the best way to get happiness." There are lakhs of people who have nothing and are dying to be in your situation. Be grateful for what you have. Leave the unwanted, undesired behind and march towards the bright future.
Don't hesitate to seek medical help. I am able to talk to you only because of my doctors. Treat depression like any other medical issue and chemical imbalance as vitamin deficiency. 😄
"We are remembered only for our good work, not by the people we have in our lives..."
Thank you. My best wishes are with all of you.