Warriors Of The Mind

Fighter's Stories

A Challenging Choice

I recently graduated from a reputed college and hail from a happy family where I received a good upbringing. I have been grappling with a question which I didn’t feel comfortable sharing with my parents. Despite going to a school that was co-educational, I did not get involved with boys romantically though I was judged for this by my school mates. However, these days I have been having thoughts of developing a healthy relationship with a man who shares my feelings and who respects me.

With this intention, I began observing the men in my college. I shared my plan with my close friend and with her help we zeroed in on a guy who we considered a good candidate. She gathered details about him without his knowledge and we found out that he is from a reputed family and is about to begin a job at a firm. Not just that, he was also good-looking. I had also received a few job offers and was planning to begin working soon.

However, before going ahead and approaching him, I wanted to get an objective opinion about my plan– whether it is the right step? What are possible consequences? The SAHAI counsellor I spoke to asked me to consider all aspects of a relationship before initiating it. He said that since both of us are entering the professional arena for the first time, I should keep in mind that this will bring with it a whole new set of relationships into my life- from bosses and co-workers to hierarchies of all sorts. Navigating these relationships will involve learning new skills and a considerable amount of energy. Besides, he asked me to take into account factors that might affect my prospective relationship- such as our pay packages, where we are posted, work timings, personal ambition and so on.

And since I had decided that if the relationship wasn’t to my liking, I would leave him, the counsellor said that once I have known a person intimately, did I think I would emerge unscathed if the relationship does not work out. Sharing my mind and life in depth with another person would obviously bring with it considerable pain if I choose to leave the relationship.

He asked me to consider establishing myself in my career especially since I also had plan to pursue a Master’s degree and then begin choosing a person who is worthy of me. After this, I took some time to think about all the factors which the counsellor asked me to consider while making a decision and the measured advice I got from SAHAI really helped me make a wise choice.

Naha, 22 years, Goa

About This Section

This section showcases inspirational and motivational stories of real people, while maintaining their privacy. If you also want to share your story, please email us at sahaihelpline@gmail.com. After due diligence, we will publish your story.